JESUS CHRIST! i am so tired of people being fake! i'm so far done with all of this it isn't even funny.

IF YOU DON'T WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME ANYMORE, JUST TELL ME SO I DON'T HAVE TO WASTE MY TIME ON PEOPLE WHO DON'T DESERVE IT!!!

I'M LEGAL TODAY!!!

YAYYY!!! So Happy Birthday to me.

So all of my entries are so emo all the time.. so I thought I'd make a not-so-emo one.

Yeah.. so life is pretty much amazing. The Idiot is starting to sort of pick up at rehearsals (thank god) and I'm thinking it might be good. All Region auditions Tuesday! I'm kind of excited haha, which is so choir nerd-ish of me, but oh well. I didn't practice all weekend, but I can't find my CD! Oh well.

I am sooo so so so excited for Homecoming! Omgoodness... I cannot wait. I think it'll be really fun. And...yeah... I can't wait.

And my boyfriend is amazing. This whole him being at college thing turned out to be not so bad anymore.

The group had a Sex and the City party on Saturday night, and it was so fun! My favorite part was the fake cocktails haha. Our group is pretty much amazing, and we have the best ideas ever.

So yeah.. there's a happy entry. Everything's just going really well right now. : )

Currently Listening The Essential Simon & Garfunkel By Simon & Garfunkel see related

i still don't understand people who stress over things that really won't matter in the future. but at the same time, i'm guilty of doing it sometimes.

i still don't understand how people can't see the effect their actions have on the people and enviroment around them.

i still don't understand why people are so selfish.

i still don't understand how people can see violence as a solution to any problem.

i still don't understand how "self defense" could be used and accepted as an excuse for violence.

i still don't understand how having guns makes people feel safe. is it really comforting for someone to know they have the power to hurt, or even kill, someone?

i still don't understand why people want to look and act the same.

i still don't understand why it's better to lie about or change who you are to be liked and accepted by others.

i still don't understand why getting a good grade is more important than actually understanding the material. and i hate that school is making me start to become more concerned with grades.

i still don't understand how people can actually believe anyone deserves to go to hell, especially if only for their different, and perhaps misunderstood, beliefs.

i still don't understand not thinking for yourself, following someone else's rules and regulations, or allowing a book, leader, or anything else to tell you what's wrong and right.

i still don't understand disrespect.

i still don't understand why people refuse to be more open minded to things that are different.

i still don't understand why we constantly try to live up to society's expectations, and i still don't understand who could create such impossible standards.

i still don't understand why people are encouraged to be different, to be individuals, but the moment they do something against everyone else they're looked down on for it.

i don't understand why we always want something different- something better. why can't we learn to be happy with what we have?

why is it so hard to be happy with what and who you are? why can't i be happy with everything about myself? i try but it's just so hard. and i'm discontent with silly things, things that shouldn't even matter.

i'm tired...

I read Felicity's entries, and they made me very pensive haha. So here I am. My god I never thought my Senior year would start out so stressful. I mean... ITS, choir (being an officer of both), theatre, and AP English are killing me. Auditions are tomorrow and I still need to memorize my second monologue. I mean, I have all day, so that's not a big deal. I'm just a little nervous.

Ryan left today. It's... weird. I dunno.. I mean I know we're going to be fine and I know it won't even really be that big of a deal, but I'm still kind of scared. Mostly because it's just something different and I don't know what it's going to be like or what to expect. But I know we'll be fine.

I'm ready for football season to start. And plays. I really hope I make The Idiot, not only because I just really want to be in it, but also because it'll keep me busy on the weekdays. I hate having spare time 'cause it just gives you time to overthink things and I hate doing that.

Alright well.. I need to do laundry, practice/memorize monologues, work on an English sort of mini-project, and do homework so.. peace out.